Mr. Docker Is Off His Rocker! (My Weird School, Book 10)
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Something weird is going on!
Mr. Docker must be a mad scientist. He does nutty experiments and has an evil, demented, cackling laugh. Plus he invented a car that runs on potatoes! Mr. Docker is the weirdest science teacher ever! Is he trying to take over the world?
annoying. “Guess what, A.J.?” Andrea said as we were putting our backpacks away. “Your butt,” I replied. (Anytime somebody asks, “Guess what?” you should always say, “Your butt.” That’s the first rule of being a kid.) “I know what A.J. stands for,” Andrea said. “Do not.” “Do too.” We went back and forth like that for a while. There’s no way Andrea could know what A.J. stands for. I never told anyone. Even my best friends, Ryan and Michael, don’t know. If anyone ever found out what A.J.
much iron was in each kind of cereal. All morning I tried to think of an excuse for not bringing in an experiment. I couldn’t say my dog ate it because I used that one last time. Besides, I don’t have a dog. Finally it was time for science. Mr. Docker came to our class so we wouldn’t have to carry our experiments to the science room. Everybody had an experiment on their desk. Everybody but me. “Didn’t you do an experiment, A.J.?” asked Andrea. “You’re going to be in trouble.” “So is your
face,” I said. Let me give you some advice. If you ever get stuck and you don’t know what to say to somebody, just say, “So is your face.” If somebody says you’re ugly or some other mean thing, just say, “So is your face.” There’s nothing they can say. You really can’t go wrong with “So is your face.” Everybody started asking Mr. Docker questions. “How can you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?” Emily asked. “Alligators have bigger snouts,” said Mr. Docker. Wow, Mr.
It was the greatest moment of my life. “What kind of fish was it?” Mr. Docker asked me. “A sucker barb,” I said, and everyone laughed just because “sucker” is a funny word. “Can you tell us anything about sucker barbs, A.J.?” I didn’t know a thing about sucker barbs. I never even paid any attention to our fish. That’s probably why I forgot to feed it before we went on vacation. “I’ll look sucker barbs up in my dictionary,” said Andrea. She started flipping through the pages. “S…S-H…S-P…S-T—”
nose is disgusting! Not to mention all that other stuff. “No more questions today,” Mr. Docker said. “I want to show you something.” He had a big pot on his desk, and smoke was coming out of it. “What’s that?” Andrea asked. “Liquid nitrogen,” said Mr. Docker. “It’s a gas that has been turned into a very cold liquid. Now don’t try this at home, kids.” He took a long rose and dipped it in the pot. Then he took it out and hit the rose against the chalkboard. The rose petals cracked off like